Investment Returns In One Year: Gold 28%, Silver 80%, Crude 40%, Sensex 35% & ONION 880%, Kaash.. Ek Quotes

Investment returns in one year:
Gold 28%,
Silver 80%,
Crude 40%,
Sensex 35%
&
ONION 880%,
Kaash..
Ek Lakh ke Pyaaz liye hote
to NEW YEAR ke liye Europe me hota..

A man doesn't have vacation problems:
his boss tells him when to take them,
and his wife tells him where..

Maine poocha chand se ke dekha hai khain
mere yaar sa hasin
chaand ne kaha abey paagal
itni unchaai se kuch dikhaai deta hai kya..

Why is Fire Engine RED in color?
Ans: Fire Engine has a Ladder
Ladder has Steps
Steps are to be climbed on Foot
Foot is to be measured by a Ruler
Ruler can be a King or Queen
Elizabeth is the Queen of England
Elizabeth is also the name of a Ship
Ships sail on Water
Water has Fishes
Fishes have Fins
The people of Finland are called Fins
The national flag of Finland is Red
So Fire Engine is RED in color..

Boy: I love you.
Girl: But, I love someone else..
Boy: Ok..No problem, your happiness is more important for me
than your love .
.
.
Moral - Jaha kuch nahi kar sakte waha
dialogue to achcha chipkaa hi do.!

Father to son: Whenever i beat you,
you don't get annoyed, how you control your anger..?
Son: I start cleaning the toilet seat with your toothbrush.

A very wealthy old man was dying and summoned his lawyer, his Priest, and his Doctor.
As his final and last wish, he gave each 2,50,000 in cash. He said he wanted to prove that you "could" take it with you when you die. He requested that each one of them throw the cash in his grave just before they shoveled the dirt in.

A few days later at the funeral the Priest walked up to the grave after the Eulogy and with tears in his eyes , tossed the money into the grave. Shortly after, the Doctor also did the same. Last the lawyer came and tossed in an envelope.

At the family gathering, or wake if you will, the Priest walked up to the Doctor and the lawyer and said, "I must confess, I kept out 25,000 of his money for the orphanage". With that the Doctor also confided that he too kept out 50,000 for the new Medical Clinic for the poor. The lawyer then exclaimed, "Shame, shame on you both!, I gave him a check for the entire amount!"